Baptism - Baby noises

Being the Choir Director was very different to being the Youth Worker in my Congregation. I saw things with different eyes. As the Choir Director, I ensured there was a beautiful blessing, sung with gusto and delicacy, preferably not being sung as a battle-cry, but as more of a lullaby. As the Youth Worker, the Battle-cry seemed more apt. As the Choir Director, I focused on blessing. As the Youth Worker, I focused on the serious task of discipleship. Our focus, as a congregation, I reasoned, was to bring this new person to our version of fullness of faith and life in Christ.

The term "Blessing" is meant to convey bringing the best out of. Yet, often, we think of Blessing as a gift to bestow. We have it. You don't. We will generously and magnanimously give you this gift. We will make a big deal of our sacrifice and generosity. You will be humbled and grateful for the joy we enable for you.

We have the goal of building the Kingdom. To do this, we will build the Church - make it stronger. We are the bearers of this capacity. We represent salvation. We will bring our energies to bear on your poor unformed spirit. We will shape you. This is called Formation.

Where did I lose the sense of blessing as a gentle ministry? When did I forget about unconditional love? When did I begin to believe the Church was the answer? When did I forget about God, revealed in Jesus Christ, and made present in peoples' lives (collective plural intentional) by the Spirit of Jesus Christ?

I recollect learning the distinction between baptisms of infants from 'outside' and baptisms of infants from 'our own'. The visitor baptisms were a service we provided, out of our sense of bestowing grace. The home-grown baptisms were an affirmation of our own faith and righteousness as a community. We treated the external baptisms as mission outreach. We treated internal ones as fruit.

As a Youth Worker, I learnt to be critical of the outsiders. I began to focus on what discipling tools I could provide so that those from outside could be properly indoctrinated with out culture and world view. I created send-home packs and made visits to outsiders, determined to bring them into the fold. I did not worry so much about those from inside. They were saved. I was not so sure about the outsiders.

In my arrogance, I was sure God's work and effectiveness was limited by me.

In the eyes of the Church, I was an effective agent of God... much to my shame and the shame of the Church!

Later, I would be involved in the development of and co-teach a course on Understanding the Sacraments. We asked students to reflect on the meaning of their own baptism. As a teacher, I was committed to only asking students to do those things I was willing to do myself. When I wrote my assignment, I spent the next few months unpacking it in Supervision sessions with my Mentor.

I was baptized as an infant by a Church, presented by non-believing parents, so that one day I would be able to get a good education by attending a Church School that required students to have been baptized. My parents had no intention of my becoming a 'believer'. Nevertheless, I was evangelized at school by another student, Anna. Around the time I became a Christian, I was disowned by my Atheist-Buddhist-Aussie-Chinese parents.

Persecuted for belief, my faith grew stronger. (What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.) Teachers and other students took my pastoral care on and people loved me into God's grace. The fulfillment of Baptism came at the generous sacrifice of many, from many different church communities, over many years.

In supervision, I reflected, infant baptism invovles:

• Faith - that God is at work in the bigger picture
• Commitment - to nurture the baptized, even if they dont turn back up for many years
• Still Being Around - for all the life transitional moments to come
• Long-term Societal work - being in schools, community organizations, community events, public places

Don't get me wrong! I delight in baptizing believers, adults, people who profess justification by their faith. I have just come to think that the criticisms aimed against infant baptism represent the laziness of Christian communities who have forgotten that missional work requires generational commitment.

Are we so captured by perceptions of parents and control issues, that we believe God's love will be stopped as we judge the failings of family attendance at "our church"? In the Wesleyan tradition, the baptismal liturgy has the baptism taking place BEFORE any promises are made. This is because Methodists hold to an understanding that God blesses before we can even respond. We only love because God first loves us. Whether infant or adult baptism, whether it is someone who can articulate their faith or someone who cannot, we baptize BEFORE any testimony of faith is given. The testimony of faith may come immediately after tha baptism or it may come many years later. If we faithfully pray for someone at their baptism, do we not believe that we are praying for God's will that this Child of God may one day declare God's praises?

When I baptize a child, I do not know whether they will declare faith within my lifetime. Of course, there is more likelihood that their declaration of faith may be encouraged by believing parents, but, a person's faith is not just that of their parents, either. If an adult is baptized today and seeks a more meaningful baptism in 2 or 5 years time, how much of this is about how they 'feel' rather than the testimony to what God has done. I happen to believe that the sacrament of Baptism is about us all testifying to God's work, not our own. By all means, affirm and testify to faith through a reaffirmation of Baptism, but do not belittle what God has been doing, continues to do and will do through eternity.

Jesus Christ's love remaines constant - even when we do not recognize it. Jesus does not need to be recrucified, so tell the story of Baptism, but do not make it any less than the miracle it represents and points toward - the love of God - from before we even know or acknowledge - right through - forever and ever. AMEN.